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EP 27: BET Hip-Hop Awards; Breaking Bad Kortney talks about the BET Hip-Hop Awards and Breaking Bad Action Figures.

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Stand-Up By Me

Don’t jump on Cleveland’s LeBron Hater bandwagon (Miami style)

Burning-LeBron-James-Cavs-jersey-e1290833645182

The Miami Heat and LeBron James lost last night. That’s right people that live under a rock, spoiler alert; the second longest streak in the history of the NBA has come to an end. This means there will be no record breaking history, so go ahead and pop bottles Jerry West, because Lord knows I am.

I haven’t celebrated a loss this much since the last time the Heat lost. I though all my basketball pleasure was focused on Ohio State’s run to the Final Four. Come to find out, I had a tank full of bile that waiting to explode the minute LeBron James lost a game.1 And explode it did. As soon as I saw my boy Kirk Hendrick give Chris Bosh a MEAT session. I pronounced the game over, and began popping celebratory cans of Miller High Life. I had a smile that would make the Grinch that Stole Christmas jealous, and I have a feeling I wasn’t alone.… Read More

Don’t jump on Cleveland’s LeBron Hater bandwagon (Miami style)

Burning-LeBron-James-Cavs-jersey-e1290833645182

The Miami Heat and LeBron James lost last night. That’s right people that live under a rock, spoiler alert; the second longest streak in the history of the NBA has come to an end. This means there will be no record breaking history, so go ahead and pop bottles Jerry West, because Lord knows I am.

I haven’t celebrated a loss this much since the last time the Heat lost. I though all my basketball pleasure was focused on Ohio State’s run to the Final Four. Come to find out, I had a tank full of bile that waiting to explode the minute LeBron James lost a game.1 And explode it did. As soon as I saw my boy Kirk Hendrick give Chris Bosh a MEAT session. I pronounced the game over, and began popping celebratory cans of Miller High Life. I had a smile that would make the Grinch that Stole Christmas jealous, and I have a feeling I wasn’t alone.… Read More

If Ohio State doesn’t make the Final Four, they’ve underachieved

Deshaun Thomas

 

I still can’t belive what I saw at the end of Ohio States’ game against Iowa State. You could have told me that Aaron Craft would step up at the end of the game to make a big shot. However if you told me that shot would be a 3 pointer after he had waived off the leading scorer in the Big Ten (Deshaun Thomas). I woukd have said, “My boy Aaron Craft must have been feeling it. On a Rick James in the 80s type of level. He must have been slapping the other team around (MEAT style).”

 

Aaron Craft against Iowa State

While I didn’t believe that Aaron Craft had a bad game, I must admit that the egg was in the building. And when I say in the building I mean on the sideline about to take his warm ups off, and saddle up next to Craft on the free throw line.… Read More

If Ohio State doesn’t make the Final Four, they’ve underachieved

Deshaun Thomas

 

I still can’t belive what I saw at the end of Ohio States’ game against Iowa State. You could have told me that Aaron Craft would step up at the end of the game to make a big shot. However if you told me that shot would be a 3 pointer after he had waived off the leading scorer in the Big Ten (Deshaun Thomas). I woukd have said, “My boy Aaron Craft must have been feeling it. On a Rick James in the 80s type of level. He must have been slapping the other team around (MEAT style).”

 

Aaron Craft against Iowa State

While I didn’t believe that Aaron Craft had a bad game, I must admit that the egg was in the building. And when I say in the building I mean on the sideline about to take his warm ups off, and saddle up next to Craft on the free throw line.… Read More

Top 5 NFL draft busts, 1998 – 2008

Everyone likes a good draft bust, the hype, the hope, the shame, and the blame.

They get GM’s fired and ammo to opposing fans to hold over someone’s head forever. There have been dozens over the years, but these five stick out as legendary.

The criteria I used is: overall performance, who was picked after them, and overall strength of that draft.

I chose this time frame because it takes about 5 years to judge a draft. And hopefully, your team isn’t one of them.

5. Robert Gallery, OT, Oakland Raiders, #2 overall 2004

robertgalleryoaklandraidersTechnically, Gallery hasn’t had a bad career. He was a solid guard for a few years, and was a starter. Coming out of college, he was hyped as a quick footed tackle who a team could plug in and forget about the position for a decade. At Iowa, Robert was a 2 time all American, and his performance and measurables all screamed franchise tackle.… Read More

Top 5 NFL draft busts, 1998 – 2008

Everyone likes a good draft bust, the hype, the hope, the shame, and the blame.

They get GM’s fired and ammo to opposing fans to hold over someone’s head forever. There have been dozens over the years, but these five stick out as legendary.

The criteria I used is: overall performance, who was picked after them, and overall strength of that draft.

I chose this time frame because it takes about 5 years to judge a draft. And hopefully, your team isn’t one of them.

5. Robert Gallery, OT, Oakland Raiders, #2 overall 2004

robertgalleryoaklandraidersTechnically, Gallery hasn’t had a bad career. He was a solid guard for a few years, and was a starter. Coming out of college, he was hyped as a quick footed tackle who a team could plug in and forget about the position for a decade. At Iowa, Robert was a 2 time all American, and his performance and measurables all screamed franchise tackle.… Read More

Will Seattle fans love these Seattle Seahawks…Harvin, Sherman, and all?

PeteCarrollSherman

The Seattle Seahawks have undergone a transformation.

They have distanced themselves from the passive aggressive organization; that was happy to have a serviceable quarterback, a running back that accumulated empty stats, and a false profit1 (Mike Holmgren) making all the decisions. Now there a team straight of the Pete Carroll handbook, which states in section 1-13 do whatever you want, just win.

That’s the motto of these Seattle Seahawks. They have a bunch of talented players that pop pill, steal donuts, and grow dreadlocks. And oh! There are so many dreadlocks on this team. (The dreadlock to regular hair ratio can be an indicator of how much MEAT your team has. If you don’t believe me, watch college football team in the SEC). Basically Pete Carroll has assembled the team that the NCAA wouldn’t allow him to. This attitude will only get stronger with the addition of Percy Harvin.

Harvin was a malcontent in Minnesota and at the University of Florida.… Read More

The Sacramento Kings move to Seattle hits roadblock

SeattleBack

Yeah…so about the Sacramento Kings moving to Seattle. Perhaps the fans in Seattle jumped the gun.

For the last 2 months all I’ve heard is,

 

Seattle sports fans – “The Sonics are coming back.”

Me – “Really…what makes you say that?”

People that think reporters matter – “I read a story about it in the newspaper. As a matter of fact we’re getting a hockey team too!”

Me – “Really…what makes you say that?”

People that think the city of Seattle is going to build another stadium for a team that stinks – “Well their building a stadium downtown”

Me – “Really…we will see.”

*please note that the Seattle Supersonics are never coming back. They can’t come back because they no longer exist. If somehow in the – hell no it will never happen – chance that the Oklahoma City Thunder moved back to Seattle you could argue that the Sonics were back.Read More

The Sacramento Kings move to Seattle hits roadblock

SeattleBack

Yeah…so about the Sacramento Kings moving to Seattle. Perhaps the fans in Seattle jumped the gun.

For the last 2 months all I’ve heard is,

 

Seattle sports fans – “The Sonics are coming back.”

Me – “Really…what makes you say that?”

People that think reporters matter – “I read a story about it in the newspaper. As a matter of fact we’re getting a hockey team too!”

Me – “Really…what makes you say that?”

People that think the city of Seattle is going to build another stadium for a team that stinks – “Well their building a stadium downtown”

Me – “Really…we will see.”

*please note that the Seattle Supersonics are never coming back. They can’t come back because they no longer exist. If somehow in the – hell no it will never happen – chance that the Oklahoma City Thunder moved back to Seattle you could argue that the Sonics were back.Read More

  • See Me Live, (Stand-Up Style) Comedy Showcase

    The first Sunday of every month Kortney hosts and produces a stand-up comedy show at Naked City Brewery & Taphouse in Seattle entitled, (Stand-Up style) Comedy Showcase Naked City Brewery You can buy tickets now on Brown Paper Tickets…more

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